Saturday, March 29, 2025

Elyza Diaries: Part 3



The Child Who Witnessed the Greatest Scam in Sibling History

Just like my sister’s face when she realizes I’m ‘busy,’
yet in the exact same position I was an hour ago.
A facial expression that says it all.




Me: "I’m busy." 

Also me: completely motionless for 3 hours.

The perfect crime.
A groundbreaking performance of exhaustion...
from imaginary labor.


She rolls her eyes,
sighs like a mother of five (but she’s eleven),
and wails my name like I just sold her to another family—
then she laughs, and I know I’ve won.

 

I Show Love Through Comedy; For Her, It's Simply Being There

I was never one for plans, just hoping my future self deals with it. But now, I’m pondering a career where I get paid to drag my little sister around the world, sample the candy she swears is ‘the best thing ever,’ and adjust my plans according to the rise and fall of her blood sugar levels. Somewhere between the sugar highs and giggles, I found my favorite plan.

If adulthood ever tries to make her boring, I’ll descend from the heavens and handle this—
with water balloon sneak attacks, endless car karaoke, and dance-offs that’ll burn calories and dignity. 🤣

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