What if?

 

Looks can be deceiving

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I was looking into a case earlier involving 11 different individuals. It’s such a random mix of people with totally different backgrounds, kaya naman kanya-kanya sila ng trip at diskarte sa kung pa'no sila mag-cope. Wala naman akong balak mag-imbestiga sa buong buhay nila. Gusto ko lang talagang makita kung ano yung mismong nag-forge sa kanila. It’s a shame the file just glossed over that.

Hindi yung mga halatang sketchy na tao na pag nakasalubong mo, mapapalingon ka na lang sa likod mo. O yung mga taong mapapa-isip ka kung safe ka ba talaga kapag kayong dalawa lang ang nasa elevator. You know what I always tell my little sis? It’s always the ones who seem the safest who you really need to watch out for.

I kinda lost interest in the case earlier, so I just ditched the whole thing and just blind-picked a random movie.

I’m halfway through and it’s starting to get under my skin. Like, if I were in the mix, what would my game plan even be? And, hypothetically, would I even last as a villager if I were trapped in the game? Or maybe I’m the one hiding in plain sight the whole time.

┐(￣～￣)┌

Patterns

 

Slow morning

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I’ve got 15 cashew nuts to munch on, lined up in rows of five on a square napkin. I’m just kinda staring at them like they’ll magically help me write something right now. Do you see a pattern here? Even when I’m washing the dishes, I have to line up the plates and utensils by category before I even start. And once everything’s in its place, it doesn’t even feel like a chore. I wasn't even gonna write today, but that little bit of order just did the trick.

 

 

It’s 3:00 PM

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I wasn’t really sure at first why I’d been slacking on my case notes, but now I realize it’s mainly 'cause I’m letting my thoughts just float instead of taking the time to write them out. If you know me, you know it’s a struggle not to overthink every angle whenever a case really fires up my brain.

The day the clouds went away

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It’s hard to watch the way people in power play so dirty, treating human lives like they’re just disposable toys…

When I feel like I can’t breathe, I think about someone I really look up to, and I feel lighter right away. The feeling's just like when the clouds finally clear up and I can feel the sun on my skin again.

Had fun listening to Iwanakutemo. Also had Eine kleine Nachtmusik on earlier. 🤍

Math & Music

 

Today was pretty fun. I was geeking out over some fractional operations and exponents earlier, but later hopped over to singing just to switch things up.

I’m still finding my way around the sounds, but 'Ode an die Freude' is actually really enjoyable. I even found myself smiling thinking back to Idahosa’s method, mainly 'cause that syllable parsing I got from him is doing wonders for pronunciation. ✮⋆

naging zombie na ang ante niyo

 

Is it weird that my favorite way to wind down now is a thesaurus and some fireplace audio? Heck if I know why I even grabbed it today. Just a gut feeling, I guess. Anyways, I might as well stock up on words for when I play spelling with Elyza.

A non-linear mind

I’ve always felt that studying in a straight line just feels pretty dull. So I started off reading the A’s, then I wander off to the category section near the end. I was actually thinking of jumping to the fun letters V, W, X, Y, Z but then I thought I’d just play along and ended up running after my sis and Azyle like some kind of a zombie.

Tawa naman sila nang tawa. Parang bagay tuloy ako maging zombie 🤭 hehe!

hindi tayo makapag-isip nang hindi lumalamon

 

Manageable

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Made myself scrambled eggs with tomatoes. Also, peanut butter toast. Ngayon, kape-kape muna na puno ng yelo pampagana for a whole day of case analysis.
( ´ ▽ ` )ﾉ☕️

 

Keri lang

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It’s sunny and bright, and it’s actually kinda fun now. Probably ‘cause it reminds me of someone who’s super bubbly and baby-faced. O dahil lang talaga to sa electric fan na naka-number 3. Pero seryoso. Di naman magso-snow sa Pinas kahit maglupasay pa tayo. Kaya nag-fishball na lang ako. Nakaka-happy pa kahit hulas.

 

The Observer

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May mainit na kanin, tapos isisingit 'tong isaw na may maraming sili sa suka. Napabili lang ako kanina habang trip ko maglakad-lakad. Btw, buti na lang introvert din yung nakasabay kong kakilala kaya walang pilitang small talk. I guess I’m more like the kind who’d profile who I’m with instead of babbling just because.

Ang Huling Budol

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Inanalyze ko na yung 3 psychological profiles kanina pero bukas ko na lang isusulat kasi higang-higa na ‘ko talaga. I'm too tired to translate these thoughts into actual sentences. I even thought I was clicking page up, pero enter key na pala yung napipindot ko nang paulit-ulit. Anyare noh?

Pero manonood lang muna ako ng isa ha tapos tulog na talaga.

total tom & jerry energy

 

Mischief 😈

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I've been feeling kinda crappy the past few days. Could be I was just feeling a bit low, but I’m back to smiling again. Oh, and I’ve got the energy to annoy my little sis now, hehe.

 

 

 

The Zen and the Apocalypse

Without the Apocalypse, I’d be bored to death. Without the Zen, the Apocalypse would be a crime scene.

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I really just write ‘cause it’s fun to see ideas mesh together. It's kinda like brainstorming and playing with Legos at the same time. Never mind all the messy notes sitting around here, I’m just happy I even started them.

Anyways, I really had fun singing along to a mix of Thai, Hindi, and Mandarin tunes today.

The vibes were just better without my little sis around since she’s like the other side of the coin; if I’m the introvert, I swear God made her a walking energy drink. Buti na lang nakakatulog ako ng mga sampung oras para may panlaban naman ako sa energy niyang pang walang tulugan, HAHA! 
┐(￣∀￣)┌

more than just a sound

 

 

I couldn't even look away while shin hyun-su was playing like I was so mesmerized I completely forgot anyone else was even here. Seryoso, nakalimutan ko na may short attention span pala ako dahil sa performance niya ng Zigeunerweisen.

Watching Han Soojin perform felt like I suddenly found myself in Ancient Rome, 'cause the way she plays is literally a time machine for me.

 

Picture yourself dropped into the Roman Empire out of nowhere.

You’re just walking around, trying to make sense of everything you’re seeing because none of it exists in your normal life. And everything was just... massive. Especially the colossal statues of gods looking down on everyone in the streets. Nothing feels familiar (even to me haha). The language, the customs, and you’re just bumping through strangers, all the while feeling the suffocating heat all around.

Then, before you can even process the view, the world blurs and you’re dropped right in the middle of the Colosseum. (Play from 6:16) Your heart starts racing as you hang onto the people next to you while everyone screams. The entire arena's shaking as the crowd goes crazy for Priscus versus Verus ⚔️

i just sing because it feels good

 

I still enjoy singing "Scars Leave Beautiful Trace" and "Spring Snow", but I’ve been replaying "You’re Precious" over and over for a while now. I tell myself I’ll try something new, then I’m back to it again. TBH, I don’t even care what the lyrics mean as long as I can sing along. ♪(´▽｀)

 

Aside from the hypnotic vibe of the song, Maprang is actually my favorite. She has such a sweet, calm vibe, like you’d never guess she’s actually a beast on the racetrack. I was just shook when I found out 🤭

The Plot Twists

 

The Empty Cup

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After listening to a few Mozart piano pieces, I then went ahead and fixed myself an iced coffee. Anyways, while I'm just sitting here nibbling garlic bread, my lil’ sis is currently facing off against other schools in a math competition.

I actually held back from helping her during prep, mostly because I’m intentionally teaching her empathy, or something. Like, when she sees the people around her struggling to keep up, she’ll be the type to take her time and help them catch up, now that she knows what it’s like to be on the losing end.

 

 

Hyperfixations ✨

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You ever sit there thinking you have a lot to say but you’re just staring at the screen? I try to start, but I just end up deleting it ’cause nothing feels like what I really want to say. You know that feeling?

I’ve got so much I’m excited to write about, like the people I find hella cool, the things about people I pick up on, plus the violin tracks I’ve been listening to non-stop. But out of everything I’ve been meaning to write about, my absolute favorite has to be Csárdás by Vittorio Monti. Listening to it feels like going in just to see what happens and coming away feeling like I just fell in love like it’s my first ever.

My Lil Sis

 

This little girl is like 100% you🤭

Ikaw na ikaw yung energy ~(˘▾˘~)✿

My assessment of this kiddo? She’s actually really clingy, but don't let that fool you because she's surprisingly very principled for her age. I’m not even kidding when I say if you ever think I’m the 'intellectual' one, Level 1 lang ako sa batang 'to.

You always joke about being my nightmare, but I hope you know that even when things are scary, I’m okay because of you. Don't ever feel like you have to put on a happy face around me, okay? I’ll cry with you or even be your backup dancer, pero wag mo ’ko isali sa AP review, haha.

i was the villain all along (oops)

 

My soul is for sale one burger

I was actually worried my baby sister was hurt because I ignored her this morning. Imagine her sitting next to me showing off her Japanese-style scrambled eggs while I didn't really say a word. Maybe my social battery was just at 0%? But then tonight she just randomly tossed me a burger looking as happy as ever.

One’s a main character and one’s an NPC. ** ( ◕ ‿ ◕ ) **

New Colors

It’s kinda crazy how I ended up learning so much from people I never really expected to like at first. Maybe it’s just because I’m finding out how cool they really are in ways I don't see in my usual little world. I guess I was just so wrong it’s actually funny cause it’s kind of like I’m starting to love colors I swore I’d never like.