You know what made me laugh just now? I randomly
remembered why I lost interest in the things I used to be so into. And why I
quietly drifted away from the people I once genuinely liked. It wasn't some
dramatic falling out, just that, over time, I could feel the lack of
genuineness. I think, when I really sit with it, it all just came down to that
one feeling. That hollow feeling you get when something just isn’t genuine. And
once I felt it, I couldn’t pretend I hadn’t. And honestly? I’m actually
grateful. Because instead of being caught up in words and all that
surface-level stuff, I found something purer. You might not expect it, but it
was math. Somewhere along the way, I stopped looking for meaning in people’s
words and started finding it in equations. Even then, I never fooled myself
into thinking I got all of it. If anything, I was confused 90% of the time and
guessing the other 10. Somehow, I think that’s why math feels honest, the way
it doesn’t need to lie just to make sense.
I enjoy writing, doing research, and building my own understanding of things, and I think that’s one way I fight off brain rot and the habit of just consuming stuff without actually processing it. Or maybe I just get bored really easily. If you don’t know me yet, hello! I’m Iya. : )
Sunday, July 6, 2025
At I:IX ante meridiem on the first day of the week🕯️
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